Finding the good in a bad situation, is this even possible? When things are bad they are bad hey…
I am going to assume that we have all had a bad day; days when everything feels like it is going wrong, the world is against you and you just don’t know how to carry on, and it feels like it will never end. I know I have and so have some of my clients.
Unfortunately when this happens, we can easily get sucked into the trap of negativity; this changes our outlook, attitudes and expectations. We start expecting more and more bad situations and this can impact on our lives and our businesses/careers.
Guess what happens then?
What we are expecting, often becomes true, we almost create more bad situations. How does this happen? We start to see the bad in every situation, sometimes we are even looking for it, searching for it and because of this we find it.
I think you will agree that all this does, is make things worse… it makes everything harder, it is exhausting and it creates a negative cycle, our lives and our businesses/careers are impacted.
A simple example of this is getting up a few minutes late in the morning, this causes us to rush and we find ourselves making small mistakes, forgetting things, feeling hassled and we become stressed. We then stumble across a traffic jam, catch every red light or just miss the train or bus, sound familiar? I am sure we have all experienced at least one day like this. This makes us feel worse, we start to look for more problems, more bad situations and we see them everywhere…
If I notice myself starting to feel like this, I take a moment to stop and to change the way I see the situation, I choose a different perspective. What I do is try to look for the good in my bad situation, I ask myself; What is good about this situation? What can I learn from this situation? How can I grow from this situation? I also work with some of my clients on this, being able to change our perspective is very powerful!
You may be thinking that this isn’t possible; however I truly believe every situation, no matter how bad, has something positive about it. Yes even the really bad ones, I have been through quite a few bad situations in my life and I have always managed to find a positive. I’ll share a few examples;
- I was made homeless when I was young, that was a pretty bad situation. However, being away from an abusive home environment freed me in many ways and made me the person I am today, for me that is a positive.
- I had a serious car accident at the age of 21 and almost died, that was a pretty bad situation. However, it made me realise life is short and we need to enjoy the here and now, it gave me permission to take more risks and to live life more fully, for me that is a positive.
- I recently went on a trip to India and it was tough, I was in tears a lot of the time and almost cut my trip short. However, it made me reassess and change my plans, my trip was transformed and I experienced things I wouldn’t have if the trip hadn’t become so bad in the first place and for me that was a positive! More to come about India in a future blog!
What I find when I search for the positive is that I start to feel better, I see more good things, which makes me feel better, happier, less stressed; I see the learning and the opportunity to grow, then I start to see more positives and I know this happens for my clients too and this also has an impact on out lives and businesses/careers!
This cycle is just as easy to create as a negative one, and what is great is that we get to choose how we react and view every situation, good or bad.
So my message to you is, whatever situation you find yourself in, there will always be something good to find, you just have to look for it, admittedly sometimes it is harder than others, but it is always there. Our perspective is everything and we can create our future by focusing on the good or the bad in every situation, what do you choose?
Until next time!